OK Folks,
This is another we watched over the weekend. We were quite pleased to see this when it arrived as we haven't seen much amateur porn and its always something that has interested us. We've never gone out and actually bought one though.
This one was a freebie thrown into our order but after watching it we still felt ripped off. Oh the humanity.. the humanity... arrrggghhhhh!!!!!! ... whatever did we do to you to deserve this?!?!
The packaging was a simple plastic sleeve so I don't know whether this is a promo copy or whether it's just a really cheap DVD. I can't find any mention of it on the web. I suspect no one will admit to having bought it.
Things opened with some promise. A young lady, walking by a stream decides to take all her clothes off and frolic in the water (as one does). Meanwhile another young lady watches for a while then takes off all her clothes and goes to join lady number one (must be something in the water). They then proceed to have the least convincing girl on girl action I have ever seen. I didn't know you could get a girl off by licking her thigh. Seriously, she was licking closer to her knee than her puss. Girls, if the thought of licking another girl is so repulsive then don't sign up for a girl on girl scene OK? You aren't doing anyone any favours by pretending. When the scene ended (abruptly) we realised that throughout the whole thing we hadn't seen a single glimpse of genitalia. We started to worry.
Scene two started with an interview. Some eastern European chick who was about to return to Bulgaria or somewhere after a US holiday. She loves American guys but was "Still a virgin", yeah right. She took her clothes off. Or we suspect she did cos they never showed below her waist. She went outside and sprayed water from a garden hose all over her body (or the bits above the waist anyway). The camera panned down... down.. towards her groin... closer..closer.. then the scene faded to black. BASTARDS! Surely they haven't sent us something *shudder* R-rated, have they? Surely they wouldn't do that to us!
Scene 3. An English chick wearing tacky purple underwear. She took off her clothes. Again nothing below the waist and she kept asking whether she was exciting us. At tip for you, Miss - you would be much hotter if you stopped asking whether you were exciting us and DID SOMETHING TO EXCITE US! To your credit you did masturbate to completion (shown above the waist only, and it was cut, so we saw the start of the O, and the aftermath, but not the important bit) which was the high point in this film. High being a relative term.
Scene 4. Some chick takes her clothes off and dances. Fast-forward button heavily used. Not a sign of below the waist action. What is this? The DVD says X rated. X rated in Utah maybe? Or maybe for the Iranian market?
Well there's 30 minutes of our life we aren't going to get back. It would have been longer but thankfully the fast-forward button saved us.
See how dedicated we are? We figured it was a dud from about 5 minutes in, but watched right to the end just so we could review it in all its glory for you.
