Vampires are all the rage at the moment. We have books about vampires. TV shows about vampires, movies about Vampires and, naturally, porn about vampires. When we last dipped into the to be watched pile we pulled out "The Vampire Sex Diaries" a 2010 production from Sex Line Sinema. Given that this is apparently a porn version of The Vampire Diaries, a "let's cash in on the vampire craze" TV series that we had never even heard of until we looked it up, we expected something pretty crap. As it happens we were wrong. Badly wrong. Vampires, according to the enormous breasted vampire writing in her journal (I'm assuming this is something that happens in the Vampire Diaries TV show as well... maybe without the enormous breasts), are sensual beings. They exist only to have pleasure...
We open with Cheyne Collins, a young biologist, who has dragged his girlfriend (the lovely and natural breasted Ally Kay) out into the desert so he can study bats. He has an old map that shows some bat colonies near a small town that would be an ideal base for exploring. Ominously, the town does not appear at all on the new map she has...
After a long drive they do indeed find the town. Almost deserted. There is a hotel and after checking in (and shagging) they set out to explore the town and find the museum that apparently contains the lost journal of some famous scientist that has some information on the local bats. Sure enough, the museum exists and after speaking to the guide (the absolutely gorgeous, natural breasted Ashlyn Rae), she arranges with the museum head (the enormously un-naturally breasted Tabitha Stevens - our vampire diarist) to show Cheyne the lost journal while Ashlyn shows Ally around the museum. After some feverish research Cheyne asks for a guide into the mountains to see the bat caves. Our enormously breasted vampire is only too happy to provide one.
Next morning, Cheyne, Ally and Jay Lassiter, their guide, set off into the mountains. By way of exposition, our narrator says that vampires can go out in daylight and can even control themselves around non-vampires until the temperature reaches 100 degrees F. Quite why she thought sending one of her minions out in the blazing desert sun was a good idea I don't know, but the inevitable happens. While Cheyne is busy looking at bats, Jay loses control and bites Ally, immediately transforming her into a cock hungry animal. They have a very well shot and vigorous fuck in the desert dust before Cheyne comes back.
That night Cheyne notices a change in his girlfriend. For a start she is running a high fever and sitting in an ice cold bath and second she is demanding sex. Searching for answers he is drawn deeper and deeper into the clutches of the chief vampire (who has fallen in lust with them both and wants to add them to her flock). Can he save her? Will they ever leave? Can they survive the jealous ancient vampire who lives in the mountains?
You'll have to watch to find out. I'm not going to give it away. The only thing I will give away is that along the way there is lots more great sex, including a very nice lesbian scene between Ally Kay and Ashlyn Rae. Seeing the two natural boobed girls together was a nice change.
This was a really well done film. The plot was good. The production was fantastic. The outside desert scenes were given a slight otherworldly look in post production that really adds to the atmosphere. The women look fantastic (and quite a few of them have natural boobs which is always a plus for me). Mrs Dave said the men were easy on the eye which was a bonus for her. The sex fits with the story and was shot really well. Graphic without resorting to gynaecological close ups, choking, gagging on cock, trash talking or any of the things that I find a big turn off. This is fantastic couples porn. So much couples porn is sanitised to the point of being boring. This isn't. It's porn you can watch with your brain on and your pants off. Do yourself a favour and grab a copy.
You can buy The Vampire Sex Diaries here through Good Vibrations in the USA.
