Sex Trek: Where No Man Has Cum B4 was released in 2005 by Platinum Blue Productions and stars a multitude of performers. Somewhat surprisingly, it has more male than female performers, including a number of them in non-sexual roles.
Now I have to be open right here, and state that I am not a Star Trek fan, so there may have been references and/or jokes that I missed. The costumes looked fairly authentic, but I'm not sure if they were just good copies or not. The really obvious stuff, like Mike Horner playing the Dr Spock look-a-like, Dr Boner, I got, but there may be subtleties that I didn't.
Briefly, Captain Quick (Randy Spears, one of the funniest guys in porn) and the crew of the Starship Intercourse are on a mission when they find a spaceship carrying Harry Balls (Ron Jeremy) and a group of horny women. They take the strangers on board, and the Intercourse sails away. While his crew is busy steering the ship out of danger, Captain Quick discovers that he should be shagged more often, and so gets down and dirty with Katie Morgan. This is OK, but not a great scene.
Dr Boner is giving two more women a medical, but they decide they are more interested in each other, so Rita Faltoyano and Malibu go down on one another. Eventually they do decide to include Dr Boner, but the scene ends at that point. This scene isn't that good, as the camera guy seems to specialise in gynaecological camera work.
Scene 3 features Gabriella Dreams (one of the crew members) and JR Langdon getting together. While it had potential, and some bits were OK, this wasn't a great scene, and the end looked like it was faked.
Captain Quick and Dr Boner can't work out why the crew seem to be being sapped of energy, particularly after shagging these visitors. It turns out that the girls aren't human at all, but instead are aliens who get their energy from human males. The tables get turned on the visitors and poor old Harry Balls gets locked up and left at the mercy of the girls. He and Vicky Vette get down and dirty in a scene which, unfortunately, is shot from a very gynaecological perspective again. There is humour there in the way the scene plays out, but it could have been done better.
In the last scene, Dr Boner gets to shag Katie Morgan. This is a more active scene than some of the others, and peaks with a wad of bright green cum being dumped on her chest. While the green cum was funny, even by cheap porn standards, the special "effect" was done cheaply.
We had high expectations of this movie, given the material, and the actors. The sex is average, at best, and didn't really inspire us. It probably wouldn't even be that good to wank to. It is funny in parts, but the humour is decidedly patchy. Randy Spears (who can be side-splittingly funny) had most of the best lines, but they just didn't gel for this movie. It was OK, but I'm not sure if it's a keeper, and it's definitely not in the same league as Hercules. Probably best to rent it first.
